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Kim was up as usual and sitting outside sipping what looked like a cup of tea. She had
her back to me and I stood at the door taking in her beauty. I had grown even fonder of
her. She really did take my breath away. I heard Phil and John making a fuss behind me
as they both got up and
helped themselves to the usual feast that awaited us every
morning. My gaze was still intently focused on Kim. The more I stared at her though the
more distant I began to feel. I felt my feelings for her start to recede and they were
replaced with the kind of feeling you get when you speak to someone you are not very
fond of. It was getting stronger.
I fought the feeling quickly and the anger building up inside me made it easy to break
the hold Kim had on me. The fact that I knew it was her also helped. My anger took a
few seconds to subside. I did not like having my feelings tampered with. I was also angry
because I couldn’t understand why.
“You can’t blame me for trying,” she said.
“Trying what?” I replied with a slight edge to my voice.
“Come sit,” she said, “please.” I sat next to her. She put her hand on my leg and spoke
to me with tears in her eyes. “I like you so much Matthew, I really do, but..........” she
broke off.
“But what?” I asked in a much softer tone.
“But we can’t distract each other by having our feelings for one another interfere with
what it is we have to do. We will need to have our wits about us and we will more than
likely be apart from each other for long periods. For now, I think its best that we just
remain friends.”